Portrait of Isolation - Rise Up!

One of the first things Jess said at the start of the project was “I have this amazing little boy and a brilliant, supportive husband, but I feel I’m not living in the moment and enjoying what I have as I’m constantly riddled with anxiety and low mood.” There was a real sense that she should not be feeling as she did.

As we talked more, she mentioned the idea of starting to live again’ - I asked her to describe what that feeling would be like?

Did she had an image of how that might feel in her head? Could she visualise it?

The idea for the painting came directly from her response …

I think everything would be as it is but brighter, and I would feel lighter. Almost as if I’m currently living in black and white, my shoulders feel heavy with weight of my head.

I suppose I mean it is like living in an old black and white film, when I want to be in technicolour – if that makes sense! I think I said before I would change absolutely nothing about my life, I love the life I’ve created for myself, I just wish my demons would keep at bay so I can enjoy it.

Did you ever see that film, Pleasantville? Everything started off in black & white, then gradually as the film went on the characters and their surroundings started going colourful as they rebelled or essentially started living.

This all gelled with a sense that Jess felt trapped in her home … I wanted to create a painting that captured this sense of rising up – of the weight being removed and her breaking free – again I felt the painting would be more powerful if she herself were the person rising up – she echoed the comments of many of the participants: –

The idea of me being in it sounds very scary,

I avoid photos, so a painting seems even more scary.

However, my husband says I’ve come this far lol so I should go for it.

JESS and ZARA are now working on a series of PODCASTs entitled “Mum’s unscripted” – with the goal of allowing Mum’s to know they are not alone … and that there is no shame attached to their feelings